Don't Forget Your Towel

Whoever invented even the idea of Tuesday should die a long, slow, gruesome, and painful death. The kind that's full of knives and torturous devices applied in sensitive areas. They can also burn in hell after they die.

Look sky, stop raining.

So here I sit-- in my little filament cubical, sipping my hot water sans tea and smelling all the offices' breakfasts in the break room, and thinking how overrated rainy Tuesday mornings are...
or perhaps Rain in general.

"Explore the realm of catharsis... in real time.
Rain fell through the night. No dress rehearsal. This is our life"
-Gordon Downie

Escapism helps. When Noah felt that his life was getting bogged down in the shit tedium of monotonous existence he thought it'd be a good idea to march off into the desert and build himself a boat.
Granted, a bit extreme (tho it worked out pretty well for him what with the Flood and all) my brand of escapism comes Three-fold.

1) I write
2) I wear a mask
3) I dropped out of college

Writing usually helps. But I gots to be more prolific. 3 posts a week. C'mon! Stephen King has already written 20 pages before he takes his morning dump, and then he thinks so little of what he's done that he procedes to use the various pages of his first draft as both toilet paper, and rolling paper for his mid-morning blunt.
Quantity over Quality. Too much of a good thing is more good.
How're y'all to live vicariously if I ain't writing?

Not for lack of words to say, Never enough time in a day.
Work gets in the way, and I need the bosses' pay.

But I still need a way to escape this dungeon this morning. Something to dive in to. And if writing doesn't work perhaps I should play-up the dual identity angle.

“I have never used steroids, period.”
- Rafael Palmeiro

Sometimes we lie. Because a lie can be like a mask and we all need something to hide behind. Not always. But days like today when the workload piles up in a deluge and you would be soaked in an instant if you set one foot outside...

The world is a lot darker and sadder than it seems, at times. The scene is my little cousin, now nearing the beautiful delicate cusp of womanhood at 13, watching a home movie of herself. Smiling carefree girl in a pink dress dancing, dancing. So pretty, and yet an unescapable sadness haunts everything about this scene.

Solitude is not cowardice, its okay to run away.
Recently it occured to me while watching cartoons and anime on TV, that in most of these shows when the main protagonist or hero/heroine encounters a foe which they cannot defeat with their current powers, they usually exiles themselves to some place far away in order to meet a master, a teacher or a person that would help in developing the neccessary skills or powers in order to defeat the previously unopposable foe.
Exile, the pursuit of knowledge, the return. It's part of everyone's story.

Hiding behind a mask for years needn't be my defeat, if in the process I am accumulating the skills I need to carry on with my life productively.

Otherwise, a disheveled future awaits me. I’ve been through my share of demons, and I don’t particularly wish to dig them out of their graves. But lately I've been thinking about going back to school.

"our society are presently being eroded by a rising tide of mediocrity"
-Glenn Seaborg

Not that getting me back into school would halt the fall of Rome. But I'm smart. I just need to find some way to focus. I can't even calculate how much time I've wasted shooting shit with the Dude when I could've been studying. I don't want to be one of the losers in the back of the classroom drawing rude pictures on the desk anymore. I'm older. There is money for tuition, expenses, life, and pleasure... I could make it work.

Drowning in the harbor of regret. Surrounded on three sides by uneasy plateaus of incredible proportions, invading and assaulting my quivering mind left cold and destroyed, out of sight in a fragile churning riptide of sad blasting sea.

I've got to get my mind organized. Don't want to wind up another island of diluted reason in a sea of hypocrisy.
Want to make my voice heard. Want to be a bright white light. Maybe school is the way to do that.

Shit. I've got to just do something. The rain is coming down and all around me the waters are rising. I should just pick an avenue of recourse and dive in.

Hope springs eternal, but so does my overflowing toilet. Just because you hear a bubbling liquid doesn't mean you should dive right in. A gurgling caldron of shit awaits.

-The Right Reverend Masked Man