Fire Rain & Twitterpation

headed to our Fire pit by the sea.
me, cheryl & Christine
                                 to start the fire.
it was fun (& AMUSING) with the fire starters and coal cause we were terrified
cheryl was afraid of the smoke, 
Christine was afraid of the Fire
& I...was afraid of the sea

                                we started the Fire
                                we are the Fire

Lately, Cheryl Is possibly the best looking creature on earth, except for those couple years where I thought that any girl who could play drums was just about the sexiest thing ever. Anyway.

I'm twitterpated? Can you tell?

 

So I'm there talking to Cheryl.  She has big dreams of moving to San Francisco and starting a new life.  She is really hyped up about this and has many positive expectations for her dream to live up to.

 "Life in San Francisco is still just life," I tell her.  "We're not going to wake up one day and find things totally different." I say, "We won't all of a sudden be the grown up version of ourselves that we envision... with all of the problems of youth that you face gone and done with.  This is it."

She looks to the sea. "That absolutely terrifies me.  That I may always feel as unsure of myself as I do.  As foolish as I do."

"We don't transform into a grown ups.  But I'll always be me.  You'll always just be you.  No matter if you live in New York or Austin or San Francisco."

She smiles, as if the voice in her head has just delivered a punch line.  "We all become who we are" she says.  I laugh.  She is quoting me!

"We all become who we are"  We have to live with that.  Take comfort in your discomforts.  Be secure in your insecurities.    I squint to distinguish the cloudy gray sky from the churning gray sea.   "I'm all I've got."

"You've got me, too," she says, reaching her hand out to mine.

 

The more I grow up, the more I realize: This is life. Move anywhere you want, try to start anything new, nothing is going to change. The world does not change for people.  People have to change themselves. There are no quick fixes, no easy solutions to our problems.  

It is a disappointing reality. 

 

It's nice to have friends
what you need & when

                                 to start the fire.

salty air swelled with rain (& we ran) and ran away thru cool fire-dousing rain
three young hearts stoked

holding hands soaked

and smelling of smoke
                                 we started the Fire.
                                 we are the FIRE